This is going to be a hard entry for me to post, but I post it to give a better understanding into what makes me, me.
I've recently discovered something about myself, something that no one really knows about, yet. What I'm about to say is hard to explain, and may put some people off. But this is about what makes me tick, so bear with me.
I am a bisexual. This, most of my close friends already know about. I make no move to hide it, and everyone takes it in stride. This I've known for quite awhile. What I've recently discovered, is that I'm polyamorous as well.
Polyamory has many different meanings, and not everyone views it the same way. My favorite, and the one I most closely associate with, is this one, which I found here:
"Polyamory means "loving more than one." This love may be sexual, emotional, spiritual, incestuous or any combination thereof."
That, at it's base, is what I identify with.
With that said, I don't include the love I feel for my friends in that. To me, that's a completely different kind of love. It's difficult to explain something like this, so just bear with me.
The kind of love I'm talking about is the romantic, lovey-dovey kind of love. The kind you feel towards a boyfriend/girlfriend/husband...you get my drift.
This realization didn't come to me overnight, and it's not something I take lightly. I feel what I feel. I've spent a lot of time thinking about, and analyzing those feelings. I know now that this is a true piece of my being, and not some sort of a whim. It's just another part of who I am.
Please be respectful in any comment you may decide to make. If you decide to be an ignorant douchebag, your comment will be deleted, you'll be blocked and then incinerated before my wrath. You have been warned. Have a nice day. ^_^
About Me
- Dee
- I'm a music obsessed pyromaniac with a vampire fetish. I love bacon and I tend to curse...a lot. Oh, and my mind has taken up permanent residence in the gutter.
5 comments:
Sexuality is something that everyone has to grapple with at some point in their lives. Some people need to rationalize it more then others.
I've known that I was pansexual since high school. I guess that I just don't like making people uncomfortable and it never really bothered me. I knew what I was, but I guess I never felt the need to mass message it. I just let it rest until someone asks me about it. That and I'm pretty chill about sexuality in general. People are what they are, everyone is different. I don't see a reason to come down on anyone for it.
So, you're pretty cool by me. :D
I really don't mind who knows, and this is something I feel those close to me should know. :)
Oh, and I had to look up pansexuality. :Þ
Dee, I'm just happy that you've found something to identify with. =) I still love you, no matter what your sexual preference.
I love you no matter what your sexual preference but, as for my own sexual identity... I was involved with too many polyamourous people, partners I couldn't really "be with" because they couldn't just be sexually amourous with one person. It wasn't just sexual/romantic incompatibility between us, it was a disaster and my heart paid the price. I found out over time that I couldn't be polyamourous like my lovers were. I can only stand to be with one person at a time! But I tend to attract mates that are poly. So I have a bit of a bias against that relationship practice, but the bias is my own -- I found out I'm a very boring bisexual! Sometimes I like girls, sometimes boys, but I only develop sexual relationships with those who can only stay with me. I'm glad so many of my friends are happy in their poly relationships, but it's just not for me, and that's okay, too.
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