Tilting the Hourglass

     You know what I think is a load of shit? Putting stipulations or ultimatums on friendships, especially ones you've had for while.  I mean, really.  A friendship with stipulations really isn't a friendship, is it? I shouldn't have to like all the friends someone has.  I can be civil to them, yes, but it doesn't mean I have to be friends with them too.  If someone is willing to just toss aside a longstanding friendship, and put those kind of stipulations on it, it's really not worth keeping.  Am I right? Or am I being silly? Am I misinterpreting the meaning of friendship?  I care about ALL my friends, and I hate letting people go.  I'm the kind of person who tries to fix everything, with all I have, even if, to other people, it seems irreparable and I should let go.  But I can't.  No matter how hard I try not to care, I do.  With all that I have.  And that's why, inevitably, I get deeply hurt.  It's just hurtful, to me, that someone I once cared about, and who I thought cared about me, would put stipulations on a friendship we've had for years.  I still care about that person, but day after day, I find myself resenting them more and more because of an ultimatum.  I walked away once, only to have them come back.  This is the final chance, because I can't keep getting yanked around like this.  How much does this even really mean to me?  Do I try and continue to do what they ask, even though it hurts me to do so, and have no contact with them? Which hurts more? Knowing it's over and moving on, or sticking it out and trying to do what I have to do? At this point, I really don't know.  I just feel like I can't do this anymore.  Like I'm losing everything.  How much more pain do I really need to put myself through? And is it even worth it? I don't know anymore.  I'm so torn, between trying to repair this friendship, and just giving up on it.  I'm caught in a deep, dark hole, and I don't know how to get myself out of it.