Writing/blogging about the random bullshit in my head helps me cope and deal with my anxiety and depression. It helps to externalize the problems so that I can better understand why I'm feeling this way. Sometimes it makes me realize just how ridiculous I'm being when I see it written out, but sometimes, you can't help how you feel.
Sometimes, I feel like I'm too much for people. I'm discovering that I'm quite the emotional person, and I feel things very acutely and deeply. A small problem to some, seems like a big problem to me, and I have problems letting go of things. I hold myself back, because I'm afraid of scaring those that I love away. I'm afraid of saying too much. I'm afraid of losing what I have.
Last night and into today, I've been having a lot of self-doubt issues, which is why many of these thoughts are in my head today. With everything that's been going on, I'm just having a hard time coping, and dealing with all of it. I so clearly see in my mind what I want, and where I want us to be, but it's going to take time. I'm not a patient person. Haha! I want it now, but that's impossible. I have to be patient, have faith that we'll get there, and trust and believe in, not only myself, but my family as well.
Sometimes, I feel like I'm too much for people. I'm discovering that I'm quite the emotional person, and I feel things very acutely and deeply. A small problem to some, seems like a big problem to me, and I have problems letting go of things. I hold myself back, because I'm afraid of scaring those that I love away. I'm afraid of saying too much. I'm afraid of losing what I have.
Last night and into today, I've been having a lot of self-doubt issues, which is why many of these thoughts are in my head today. With everything that's been going on, I'm just having a hard time coping, and dealing with all of it. I so clearly see in my mind what I want, and where I want us to be, but it's going to take time. I'm not a patient person. Haha! I want it now, but that's impossible. I have to be patient, have faith that we'll get there, and trust and believe in, not only myself, but my family as well.
1 comment:
You're fantastic, luv! Express everything on your mind and heart. Friends are there for you no matter what. It's best to put it out there so we can also help you understand what you're going through. Perhaps, we've gone through the same thing, too, or if anything, just listen and stand by your side.
No matter if a problem is big or small, if it's bothering you, then it's something! I would and will do all I can to help you.
I hope I'm not blabbering. Love ya!
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